Goals are often externally focused – they might revolve around earning a certain income or living in a specific area. However, what do you think might happen if your goals were even more profound and focused on you as a person?
I recently had the pleasure of speaking to Daniel Laporte, founder of Papa Bear’s Perspective, on my Goals Do Come True podcast. He’s on a mission to coach dads to let go of anxiety, overcome limiting beliefs and take better care of themselves, so that they can fully express who they are.
Entering into fatherhood
There isn’t a parenting manual that helps you understand that when you start a family, you slide down the pecking order, and it’s certainly not a topic that was freely discussed when I became a dad. Talking about feelings used to be seen as weak, but now people recognise that it takes courage and strength to open up and face insecurities and fears. I was excited to hear more from Daniel.
Daniel: “When I first start to coach a dad, they’re often totally lost. This little being has come into their life and flipped their whole world on its head until it’s spinning. Our first intention is to slow it down and reflect until we can identify any uncomfortable feelings and let any guilt or shame out into the open. It’s a really powerful way to release some of the pressure.
We each have our own journey, but I believe that until we are capable of learning how to love, accept and be more compassionate towards ourselves, we’re not capable of doing that on the outside. We have to start here; it’s a really big goal! What people don’t realise is that when they get to know and accept themselves, then they can decide which outward goals are in alignment with who they are, and they treat the people around them more lovingly.”
I’m a big fan of sending out good vibes; it’s all energy, and that’s what people feel when they’re around us. I wanted to understand more about how Daniel reached this heightened state of awareness.
Daniel: “I’ve been leaning more into my intuition and spirituality in the last few years. I wanted to let go of the need for perfection. I’ve allowed myself to come to peace with the things that I cannot control. Many of the men I work with don’t realise that once they let go of the need for perfection, they have space to breathe and get in tune with their gut feelings (intuition). If your mind is too busy, you can’t hear that higher guidance.”
Love versus fear
I loved Daniel’s willingness to live in such an open-hearted way, and his ability to encourage other men to do the same. I write down my goals daily (from memory) and pay attention to the ones that still make the list (some drop off). I was curious about how Daniel was using his intuition to set goals.
Daniel: “I base my entire life (all my thoughts and behaviours) on a love versus fear principle. I believe that we are all two parts – body and soul – and that our souls have been here before and, from previous lifetimes, know where to go, when to go, and how to make our goals reality.
Our soul communicates to us through gut feelings; but there are two rules. If we are feeling fearful and listening to our ego, which is full of limiting beliefs, you will always feel unsafe and keep stopping yourself from growing and moving towards your goals. But, if you are coming from a place of love, your soul and intuition will guide you to your highest good at all times. When you follow love, you will be successful no matter what.”
Keep it simple
What Daniel shared is a fantastic way to navigate the monkey mind that constantly projects fear and tries to stop you pursuing your goals (by telling you that you’re not good enough or not capable). I was keen to find out how Daniel might simplify this for someone who is new to such an expansive way of thinking.
Daniel: “To simplify all that, we just need to ask ourselves one question which is, ‘Do I want to do this, or do I feel like I have to?’ If we feel like we have to, it’s our ego communicating through fear; and if we want to, then it’s coming from love. If we always follow love, our inner guidance and intuition, we will always succeed.”
Daniel is writing a book on the key principles from Papa Bear’s Perspective to help men feel empowered and navigate daily challenges with greater ease. He will not only share his thought process and learnings from his journey into fatherhood, but also how to set goals that are right for you.
In the meantime, if your goal is to run your own service-based business, then I’ve recently published my second book, Think Simple, Win Big: How to Build the Business of Your Dreams With a Few Simple Goals. I’d love to encourage and support you with your goals, so please feel free to email me at firstname.lastname@example.org.